Dear The Government,
Yeah, I know we don’t really know each other that well. To be honest your shady past really puts me off getting to know you. Everyone bad mouths you, but I know there’s got to be some good in there somewhere. I’m just sad these days, because the older I get, the more I lose faith in the power of democracy. Like, I would consider myself to be a mildly intelligent, eager young person with too much passion and nowhere to put it. Why do you think I go through phases of aggressive feminism? I am the perfect target to get swept up in a political movement, I’ve got too much youth and not enough perspective. I’m from the ‘I want it now’ generation, and this sure as hell applies to social change. You wanna be radical in any kind of way, I’ll support you. Just give me a likeable early 40’s woman to tell me what to do, and I’ll do it. A Tina Fey of British politics, if you will.
But I find myself seriously lacking in the political role model department. It’s like you’re trying to not give me someone to put my undying trust in. Because realistically, your party leaders are a joke. D Cams has had his day, Eddy Mills and ol’ mate Clegg will never get the respect and support from their people because they’ve let themselves be portrayed as fools. I mean, ok, be corrupt, power mad, evil, I don’t care. But be convincing about it at least! Look at Tony Blair, possibly the worst human; the camera loved him.
I’m sure you’ve heard Russell Brand telling people not to vote, and on the one hand I agree with him, but at the same time, what kind of approach is that to solving a problem. Look at where we are now, a few months before the 2015 campaigns start up properly and were pedaled with all the good deeds you guys are going to do for me; I am at a loss as to who I would consider voting for. Waste a vote on the Green Party? Always an option, and looking like the best bet right now. This whole politics being a joke has gone on for far too long. I don’t know if politics turns you mad or only mad people go into it, but get your shit together. There must be something about the slow grind of government that removes you from any former notion you might have had about inspiring change.
And lets take a second to consider how many ministers went to Eton; never mind any other private schools. There is no way one school churns out that many boys wanting to change society for the greater good. And lets also put aside how white government is (they don’t call it Whitehall for nothing, am I right?) and just look at the lack of female representation. It’s sickening to think that this is even still a thing in a society where women are supposedly equal. You can’t ever expect unprovoked change, and when it comes to the perception of women in positions of power, it has to come from the top. It’s on you, the government, to make the image of women in power normal.
If you make me go into politics, I swear, I’ll burn that place to the ground. All I’m saying is, give me someone to root for. Anyone. Just a seemingly decent person that’ll raise the minimum wage and incite educational reform. I mean, it’s really not that difficult.
P.S. Exellent job with hiring Nigel Farage to be an extremist to make you all look normal. Great shout. Where did you find him? RADA? Kudos.